7 unique habits of low quality men, according to psychology

Let’s be honest, we’ve all encountered those men who just didn’t quite measure up. I’m not talking about height or even success. I’m talking about quality, the kind that truly defines a man.

According to psychology, there are seven unique habits that these so-called “low quality” men tend to exhibit. I’m a firm believer in recognizing patterns and understanding behaviors so we can navigate relationships better and raise our boys to be the best men they can be.

Stick around, as we delve into these habits. It’s enlightening, sometimes a little uncomfortable, but always essential knowledge for our parenting journey. Trust me, this is a conversation worth having.

1) Lack of empathy

We’ve all met that man who just can’t seem to understand anyone else’s feelings or perspectives. The lack of empathy is a key habit of low quality men, according to psychology.

“Empathy is the capacity to understand or feel what another person is experiencing from within their frame of reference, that is, the capacity to place oneself in another’s position,” says eminent psychologist Carl Rogers.

This isn’t about men being unable or unwilling to show their emotions. This is about men who are simply uninterested in anyone else’s feelings but their own.

Low quality men often fail to show compassion or understanding, leaving others feeling unheard and unimportant. It’s a behavior pattern we must recognize and address, especially in our parenting journey, as we strive to raise boys who respect and value the feelings of others.

Remember, empathy isn’t just about understanding someone else’s feelings. It’s about valuing them as well.

2) Absence of responsibility

Now, let’s talk about accountability. I remember a man I once dated who never seemed to take responsibility for anything. Whether it was forgetting our date night or messing up at work, it was always someone else’s fault.

This lack of personal responsibility is a classic trait of low-quality men. They dodge accountability, leaving others to clean up their messes. It’s a habit that can cause serious damage in relationships and is something we need to steer clear of when raising our own children.

We want our kids to grow up understanding that they are responsible for their own actions and decisions. It’s a lesson that’s just as crucial as any other in shaping high-quality men of the future.

3) Overbearing need for control

Ever met a man who needs to micromanage everything? It’s exhausting, isn’t it? This overwhelming need for control is another habit often found in low-quality men.

“Control is a mirage. The most effective behavior is to accept change and adapt,” says psychologist Philip Zimbardo, famous for his Stanford Prison Experiment. Yet, some men insist on controlling every situation, every person, every outcome. And when they can’t? They often resort to anger or resentment.

In my experience, this kind of behavior stems from deep-seated insecurities. These men believe that if they can control everything around them, they can avoid facing their own shortcomings.

It’s a raw truth we need to confront if we want to raise our boys into secure, confident men who understand that true strength lies in adapting and growing, not in controlling others.

4) Negative outlook

A constant negative outlook on life can be a draining trait found in many low-quality men. They see the glass as half-empty, always focusing on the worst-case scenario or what could go wrong.

A study found that individuals with a persistently negative outlook not only experience more stress but are also less equipped to handle it. They tend to struggle with problem-solving, making them more likely to avoid challenges rather than face them head-on.

This negativity can poison relationships and stunt personal growth. It’s essential to recognize and address this habit in our journey of raising optimistic and resilient children who are prepared to face life’s challenges with a positive attitude.

5) Inability to communicate effectively

I remember a close friend who struggled with relationships. He was a kind man, but he found it hard to express his thoughts and feelings clearly. This inability to communicate effectively is a common trait of low-quality men.

A man who can’t communicate his thoughts and feelings leaves room for misunderstandings and assumptions. This not only strains personal relationships but also impacts professional ones.

In our role as parents, it’s our duty to help our children become effective communicators – to express their thoughts clearly, listen actively, and resolve conflicts with understanding and respect. It’s a critical skill that will serve them throughout their lives.

6) Overemphasis on masculinity

Here’s something a bit counterintuitive: excessive emphasis on masculinity can actually be a sign of low quality in men.

This isn’t about being ‘manly’ in the traditional sense. This is about men who feel the need to constantly prove their masculinity, often by belittling others or refusing to show any perceived signs of weakness.

Psychologist Rollo May once said, “The opposite of courage in our society is not cowardice, it is conformity.” These men are so caught up in conforming to societal expectations that they lose sight of their individuality and authenticity.

Raising our boys, we should aim to help them understand that showing vulnerability isn’t a weakness. It’s okay to express emotions, seek help, or step away from traditional gender norms. After all, true strength lies in being genuine and embracing who you are.

7) Lack of ambition

Finally, let’s talk about ambition – or rather, the lack of it. Low-quality men often lack the drive to improve themselves or their circumstances.

Famous psychologist Abraham Maslow, known for his hierarchy of needs, once said, “What a man can be, he must be.” It signifies the importance of self-actualization and the desire to fulfill one’s potential.

In our parenting journey, instilling a sense of ambition in our children is crucial. It’s not about pushing them to achieve unrealistic goals but encouraging them to strive for personal growth and fulfillment.

Wrapping up

Navigating the complexities of human behavior can be a daunting task, but understanding these seven unique habits of low-quality men provides us with valuable insights.

Each trait we’ve discussed paints a picture of men who might not live up to our standards or the standards they should be setting for themselves.

But remember, recognizing these habits isn’t about judging or labeling men as ‘low quality’. It’s about understanding behavior patterns that can hinder personal growth and healthy relationships.

As we reflect on these traits, let’s also remember the important role we play as parents. We have the opportunity and the responsibility to guide our children in a different direction – towards empathy, accountability, positivity, effective communication, authenticity, and ambition.

In essence, it’s about raising not just ‘high-quality’ men but kind, respectful, and authentic human beings. That’s the real takeaway here. And it’s something I believe we can all strive to achieve in our parenting journey.